And unlike the narrator of this essay, thankfully we have pretty similar tastes in music! My favorite parts:
Good Lord. How can I marry this woman? She doesn't even own any songs in 5/4.
Maybe I should just pick a song that reflects our wedding theme: The Wizard's Role in an Android-Based Society.
Katie keeps reminding me that planning a wedding is all about compromise. And I agree that I don't necessarily have to approve the engineering specs for the wedding cake. I mean, it's enough that it's in the shape of the E.L.O. spaceship, but compromise on our song? Katie did say Sting. Sting would be about compromise the way carrot cake is about compromise. A dessert no one could possibly want, just to have dessert. I mean, I do respect that he decided to do "I Hung My Head" in 9/8 just to confuse the Memphis Horns, but how can I trust anyone with that kind of commercial success?
Hilarious. I love McSweeney's. Also, I should note that Mr. T loves carrot cake.