Tasting/Menu: CHECK!

On Saturday I had a very typical marathon day. It started with a tasting at our venue. We were there to settle the vegetarian entree and the last appetizer. The venue had an updated list of appetizers, so we selected a bunch to try in case we wanted to either add a fourth app or change our mind on the coconut shrimp we'd already selected.

We tried:
Phyllo cups with gorgonzola cream cheese, walnuts, and pears
Crab cakes with aioli
Lemon peppercorn prawns
Portobello mushrooms in phyllo "purses"
Risotto stuffed mushrooms

We opted to stay with the original coconut shrimp. They were yummy and we preferred them to the other seafood apps we tried. Likewise, we chose the portobello purses as the final appetizer. They were delicious, the vegetarians can eat them, and they don't contain cheese, which means I can eat them too! (I snuck a taste of the gorgonzola cups and they were yummy, but Mr. T thought the flavor, which was strong, might not appeal to everyone.)

For the entrees, we tried curried veggies and a lentil stew. They were both yummy, but we ended up going with the stew for two reasons: 1. It contains protein. I think vegetarians are frequently shafted on this, because folks don't like to work with tofu. 2. The curried veggies, while delicious (I reaffirmed that I'm a huge fan of turnips, to my surprise), seemed more like a side dish to us and we worried that folks would overlook them as an entree option.

The tasting was super quick and easy. I want more of those portobello purses right now! Nom, nom, nom....

Oh, and we opted not to add a fourth appetizer. Our coordinator at the venue said that it usually ended up being too much food with that appetizer/guest count ratio, and that it would go to waste.

Our other appetizer is a cheese station with "gourmet cheeses and crackers", and I think we'll be bringing in pumpkin butter and/or quince paste for some other options. The venue was fine with that as long as the items were store bought--something about health codes. I found that so interesting, as my sister-in-law handmade some of the desserts at her wedding. I guess because our venue is a hotel/caterer they are held to stricter standards? Anyway, I'm no Martha Stewart, so buying these things at a store is so not a problem!

145 Days to Go and OMG, We Have So Much To Do

I finally joined The Knot because they had some articles on Halloween weddings I wanted to read. The articles weren't really worth it, it turns out.

I had to put in our wedding date as part of my registration and I got an automatically generated checklist. These are the things we haven't done, and many of them are overdue according to The Knot:

• Make sure to insure your engagement ring. [We do need to do this. We also need renter's insurance. Sigh.]
• Decide on and meet with your officiant to discuss ceremony structure. [We've emailed some stuff, but no real discussions yet.]
• Brides: Start shopping for bridesmaid dresses. [Actually, the MOH and I are going to visit the other bridesmaid in LA this weekend for girl fun and dress shopping! I can't wait, it's going to be such a fun little trip.]
• Register for your wedding gifts, and don't forget to include some choices appropriate for your upcoming bridal shower as well. [GAH. No progress. We decided to register at Bed, Bath, & Beyond, but aside from agreeing that we need new knives, we don't know what to register for.]
• Brides: Decide on the bridesmaid dresses. [See above...maybe we'll get that done this weekend, or maybe the girls will just be left to their own devices. My only stipulation is that the dresses be black, and not too short!]
• Book a baker [done], choose your wedding [cup]cake[s] design[s] [to be done], and send a deposit [done].
• Start planning the rehearsal dinner. [No luck on this front. I've researched a few places, but we've only tried one, with disappointing results. We need to get back on this. I would love a more informal dinner, like Mexican food with margaritas, but there's not much near our wedding venue/hotel. Sigh.]
• Start working on your invitation wording and design. [I am happy to report we started doing this last weekend, even though Mr. T had a cold. That's info for a separate post, though.]
• Finalize your invitation wording. [TBD]
• Finalize menu and service details with caterer. [We still need to pick a vegetarian main dish and a passed appetizer. We're not doing that until October, though, so The Knot will need to scream at us until then.]
• Order your invitations and announcements (don't forget plenty of extra envelopes). [Again, TBD. Invites will take 2-4 weeks to print after a proof is approved, so we're thinking we'll send them to the printer mid-July or so. I'm torn on the envelopes...it's tempting to just have the printer do the return addresses for us, but another part of me would love to do either black envelopes with orange lining or vice-versa. And that means ordering envelopes and doing custom liners. Hm.]
• Start thinking about flower arrangement styles you like, and figure out what flowers will be in season on your wedding day. [Well, I guess I have thought about it. But I'm not entirely sure about the seasonal thing.]
• Decide on a floral scheme, choose flowers. [Not really done. Except I'd like Fall colors, and primarily reds, burgundies, and a bit of orange.]
• Reserve tables, chairs, and/or other rental equipment you'll need (unless caterer or site is taking care of it). [Mostly this is done, but we have some stereo equipment stuff to sort out.]
• Grooms: Start looking to buy or rent tux, suit, or other formal attire. [We did start...we just didn't see much! And other plans have prevented us from going shopping again. Can you hear me hyperventilating yet? This list is a mile long!]
• Book rehearsal-dinner site. [Um, no. See above.]
• Book hotel room for your wedding night. [We haven't done this yet. I think Mr. T would like us to stay at a high-end hotel near our wedding venue, whereas I would just like it to be easy, so I want us to stay at the venue (although The Claremont is sounding mighty tempting). So we're still discussing.]
• Compile packages for out-of-town guests with hotel reservation (done) and city information, and mail them out. [Our "wedsite" gives hotel info, but no city info. I'm undecided about mailing out packets, but I suppose I could put something together...in all my free time.]
• Grooms: Decide on your groomsmen's attire. [I doubt if Mr. T has put much thought into this. He only has one groomsman, so it's a little easier. I think he'd like his brother to wear a suit, but who knows what color suit, or what color shirt, or tie!]
• Book your honeymoon flights (if not using frequent flyer miles) and make all your other travel reservations. [I'm putting this one in Mr. T's lap...the mini-moon, that is. When we take a real honeymoon trip I'll be recovered enough to help plan it. For the mini-moon I'd like relaxation, good food, and a massage or two. And some nice scenery.]
• Brides: Choose your bridesmaids' accessories (shoes, gloves, etc.) and either purchase or pass along purchasing information. [Well, my girls can pick their own shoes, and they don't need gloves!]
• Grooms: Give all of the groomsmen the information they need to buy and/or reserve their attire. [Nothing done here; see above.]
• Pick out or design a ketubah or other marriage contract required by your religion. [We don't have to worry about this one. Check!]

Note that this checklist is not everything we have to do...it's just everything we should be doing during this timeframe...next month, there will be even more items looming over us! It's feeling a little insurmountable at the moment. One thing at a time, right?

Venue/Caterer: Check!

Mr. T and I signed a contract and put a deposit down on our venue today! Hooray!

It's the same venue I've been talking about (where we had our tasting); we were just emailing back and forth with the coordinator about what our start time will be. They've generously given us an additional hour and a half for free! I was anticipating paying $400 more for the extra time, but maybe the recession is helping us there and they need our business, or maybe they're just nice folks, but we are now able to start the ceremony when we want to, at no extra charge!

Also, and I hate to think this way, but I was happy to note that we'll get 75% of our deposit back if we have to cancel. I don't want to jinx us, but it's possible that, thanks to the effects of the recession, we'll need to seriously scale down our wedding plans (in that case, we'll go to city hall and go out for pizza or something afterwards!), and I was worried about just throwing that deposit money away, but it looks like we'd get most of it back.

Again, this is worst-case scenario thinking. I'm not anticipating canceling our wedding, don't you worry! However, I have friends who have been laid off, so it's hard not to be concerned about something happening to me or Mr. T. Fingers are crossed for everyone to make it through next year okay.

Anyway, enough depressing talk. I'm so excited to check that off our list! Now I need to get on dress shopping...and we need to think about our website, our invites, our registries...yikes, only 10 months to go!

I also realized I need to do some additional hotel/motel research in our area. My brother pointed out that he and his family will need a double room, and our venue, while it is a cute little historical hotel, has tiny guest rooms with one queen bed. So that's one more item for our list--possibly another room block at a more traditional hotel for the larger families.

Phew!

In Search Of...

...the perfect venue: What is it?

Here are our priorities for the venue:

1. Affordable! Would we like to get married in a historic mansion? Yes! Do we want to pay $10,000 for that pleasure? No! I think $3K is about the top of our budget for venue rental (this is not including food or beverage costs).

2. Not in SF. If we found the perfect place, maybe, but Halloween will be on a Saturday in 2009, and we think the city will be crazy that night. It could be a big pain for people to drive around in Halloween traffic.

3. Space to have the ceremony and reception at the same venue. Mr. T feels strongly about this one--he doesn't want people traipsing all over town and dealing with parking at two places. This one is a hard one; many venues have one indoor space for the reception and one outdoor space for the ceremony, but Halloween weather is unpredictable. Maybe it will be nice out, but maybe it will be freezing, or rainy! So, if we're looking at strictly indoors as an option, this means multiple rooms...otherwise, we'll need to have the chairs set up one way for the ceremony, then shoo everyone out of those chairs and set them up at tables for the reception. That seems too awkward. Finding an affordable place with multiple rooms...hard, but not impossible, I think.

4. Convenient for our guests to get to. Mr. T feels strongly about this one too. We had one venue in a public park near our house on the possible venues list until we drove by it and realized it was way, way up in the hills and would be difficult for some folks to reach. And the park won't let you put up signs, so folks could potentially get lost.

5. Works with the Halloween theme. Since most places won't let you have a free hand at decorating (nothing on the walls, candles only on the tables, etc.), we need some of that Halloween feel to come from the venue itself. Well, we'd like it to, anyway.

These are the major issues. There are many, many variables. Obviously we'd like a choice in who caters our wedding, but sometimes you don't get one (if the venue has an in-house caterer that you have to use). And some venues provide table settings and linens, but others don't, so you'd need to have the caterer provide them, or rent them. I'd like the least amount of DIY necessary, frankly. I'm not going to feel like folding up chairs at midnight on my wedding day in my corset dress, or taking out the trash. All the details are enough to give a girl a migraine. An invaluable resource is Here Comes the Guide--they summarize all of the details for you and have photos, too! Plus, it's searchable by type of venue, location, number of guests, etc. There are similar sites out there, but HCTG is the best one, in my opinion.

One thing I didn't think about when starting to budget for the wedding is "plus-plus"--that means adding gratuity and tax onto not only the venue fee but also the catering fee. This added another (estimated) $3K onto our budget! These are the little hidden costs that come out as you do more research. Luckily I'm a thorough girl, so I'm hoping our budget will hold up because I've added the extras in. So many people lose control over their budgets, stop keeping track, or just plain don't anticipate things; I don't want us to be one of those couples!

In the meantime, Mr. T is starting to regret that he didn't take me up on my offer to get married the last time we were in Vegas. He'll come around. I think.